Here's your medicine - JUST KIDDING!

Well, faithful reader, you may recall that I was supposed to start my clinical trial today. All the tests were run, all the "i"s dotted and "t"s crossed.

I got up bright and early today and had my blood drawn, filled out a bunch of paperwork, met with the trial doctor, and got the run down on all the tests and appointments I will be having as part of the trial. (There are a lot.)

The trial coordinator handed me a bag with a 30 day supply of my new magic medicine, and showed Jason and I to the waiting room. They would call us shortly to head back to the research area where I would take my first dose and then be observed throughout the day.

A few minutes later she came back with a funny look on her face. "I need you to come with me. And I need to take that medicine back." I was dumbfounded. "What?!? Why?"

It turns out my liver values had shot up, beyond the range that is acceptable for the trial.

I was devastated. I had the pills in my hand! It crossed my mind that I could have just made a run for it, see if they could catch me and tackle me to the ground!

So close!

We went to a consult room where we talked it over with the doctor. We will do another blood draw on Wednesday, and Thursday, and again next Tuesday until the counts come down to the acceptable range. I'm speculating that this could be part of the washout process. I've been sore for days, so perhaps my liver is still trying to get it all out of my system.

I'm very anxious that I have been off all cancer medicine for 10 days now, and that I don't know when I will be starting back on treatment.

Merry Christmas, huh?

Thankfully Jason, my human Valium, was by my side during all of this. I think I might have lost it if he hadn't been there. He is pretty remarkable is scary, stressful situations.

So, we went home. We had planned to spend the whole day at the hospital, but now we had the rest of the day free. We decided to make the best of it. I had been completely incapable of thinking past December 18 (I had been telling myself I just had to keep it together until then, even counting down the hours until I could get back on treatment), meaning we hadn't done any Christmas preparations. Our kids would probably appreciate some presents!

What started as an awful day turned into a surprisingly peaceful and pleasant afternoon. I guess Jason and I have a lot of experience dealing with really crappy life-and-death situations! Too much experience, if you ask me.

If you have any more good vibes, wishes, or prayers to spare, could you send them at my liver? I want to get back on treatment as soon as possible.